Crispy Satire (Issue 3)
OUR ARMS ARE TROUBLED by Obodokasi Adehtem Agbor
Why do we take up cudgels and stones
at our legislator?
Should we not hang our chins in our palms and pity his troubles?
a well-meant man who spoke with the voice of god
and made the Jewish promise
to reach Hades and bring Lucifer by his tail in three days,
but as soon as he entered the country’s group chat
our sweet well-meant man developed amnesia.
it is not his fault,
the gentleman developed amnesia.
Oh our dear executive,
why do we set up bonfires and laugh at his pains?
Should we not bath our faces in burnt ash
and weep at his woes?
He has eaten our nation’s solid account,
our nation’s solid minerals
and other solids-without-names,
each time he goes hungry from commandeering us
he pushes a slice of our sweet nation down his stomach.
you should see him in the toilet with his lenses spread on his nose
trying to push down strong solid minerals from his anus.
our excellent chief executive
has developed a red pile in his anus for eating too many solids.
My profound pity goes to the judge,
he has exceeded all knowledge
trying to spare our legislator of his forgetfulness,
but every time, the amnesia grows and grows and causes dementia.
all morning he sits behind the gavel,
hoping to help the executive deliver the nation from his anus
but each time he adjusts his gold rimmed spectacles to look
a big lump of red pile stares at him in arrogance
wearing spectacles.
Obodokasi Adehtem Agbor, a lover of books and poetry, studies Law at the University of Calabar, Calabar.